“Watch out for the guy in the bubble shield, he’s got the shotgun!!” screams your teammate, sending a chunk of bandwidth frequencies through your brittle headset a little too piercing for comfort. But with the score tied 49-49, and one more death yielding the game to the blue team, his dramatized shouts are warranted. But just as you’re about to empty a family of explosive needler rounds into “HaloGod67”, a voice from behind you exasperatingly exclaims,
“Can you turn that down? I’m trying to read!”
And just like that, it’s game over for you. The distracting remark that caused your team the game winning kill came from your ever-so-pissed-off girlfriend. For the hardcore gamer who refuses to “grow up” such pleas condemning gaming are all too familiar. Despite earning the horrible ire of non-gamer girlfriends, it’s hard for a diehard gamer to give up until he’s won the last fight, played through it again on the hardest difficulty, and collected all of the achievements twice.
If left untouched, the situation can reach the boiling point and the dreaded ultimatum may be presented:
“It’s either the Xbox or me.”
How did it get to this point? But more importantly how can this be resolved? Everything was fine when you first met her – movies nights, dinner dates, and an abundance of sex. Unfortunately, the novelty of the new relationship soon wears off, and with it comes the masks we wear to lure one another in. Eventually the movies become fewer and farther in between, the dinners become repetitive and stale, and passionate lovemaking is replaced with a few seizure-like seconds of “thanks for trying”. Now she finally sees you in your authentic form, as you now see her. Forget Sephiroth, Liquid Snake, or even Bowser – she’s worse than any digital antagonist you’ve ever encountered. To her, your gaming reflects a childish inability to cope with the pressures of the real world, and poses a threat to her position in your life. To you, her incessant nagging and threatening over your gaming makes her take on the form of an unholy, authoritarian Nazi vampire, who won’t rest until your entire video game collection is annihilated!
However, this cruel ultimatum she presents will not solve the problem, but will instead propagate new problems. Part of being in a relationship is sacrifice, but that shouldn’t mean sacrificing a life-long hobby that alleviates your daily stress. In spite of this, it is crucial that you do not counter this with the “fight fire with fire” mentality. Don’t believe me? Go ahead and see what happens when you turn the lights out as she’s reading “How to Change Your Man in 10 Easy Steps” – it won’t be pretty.
The trick is to find a game she might be interested in, so that she can “see what all the fuss is about” and sit down with you for a gaming session. Then perhaps you will be happy to see her take part in your world, and it will be reason enough for you to take part in hers. For example, if your girlfriend's hobby of choice is reading, it might mean a lot to her if you wanted to accompany her to the library every once in a while, or perhaps if you joined a book club with her. In the end you will learn new things about each other, and be drawn closer as a result. The authoritarian approach is not the way to make a relationship run smoothly. Truly invest in each other, and you’ll find happiness together. And if that doesn’t work, yeah, you guys should probably break up.
For a list of games your girlfriend might like, check out 10 Games Even Your Girlfriend Will Love.
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