10 Fast Food Abominations	10 Controversial Ideas That Really Shouldn't Be Controversial	20 Celebrities Who Have Not Aged Well
17 Examples of Plastic Surgery Gone Horribly, Horribly Wrong	What Your Magazine Subscriptions Say About Your Personality	10 Child Stars: Where are They Now?

10 Fast Food Abominations

17 Examples of Plastic Surgery Gone Horribly, Horribly Wrong

Get our articles in your inbox

Friend us

on Facebook

on Twitter

10 Holiday Records Yet To Be Unleashed

By Jim Kanavy

Tags: Holidays, Music

Tuesday, 23 March 2010

Ah, the Holiday season...the fresh cookies, sleigh bells ringing, bright lights welcoming Saint Nick, congested traffic around the Mall, screaming kids, long lines, hot stores making you wish you weren't wearing a parka, angry grandmas fist fighting over the last Zhu Zhu pet... What makes that trip to the Mall all better? Christmas music. And although there is no shortage of Christmas and Holiday music â€“ even haggard old Bobby Dylan gasped out a holiday collection this year - there are still some albums yet to be made. Here are ten Holiday albums that need to be piped into malls everywhere next year.

1) Chris Brown & Rihanna

Nothing brings families and lovers together like the holidays. Who wouldn't want to hear these kids reprise Billy Squier's "Christmas Is the Time to Say 'I Love You'"? They could call the record "Christmas Hits" or "Biggest Christmas Hits". I'm sure hits or hitting would be mentioned in the title somewhere.

2) T-Pain

Some people think all Christmas songs sound the same and with T-Pain and autotune all Christmas songs will sound like R&B hits.

3) Snoop-Dogg

Haven't you always wondered what Snoop would get for the 12 days of Christmas? Nothing goes better with the munchies than fresh-from-the-oven cookies. Would Kris Kringle be called Kriz Krizzle, Krizzle Krizzle or Kizzle Krizzle? Maybe just Father Chrizzle.

4) Slayer

Can't God & Satan get together once in a while for a birthday party? Even if Slayer doesn't want to embrace the overt religious messages of Christmas, everyone has been waiting to hear thrash metal versions of "Jingle Bells," "Frosty the Snowman," "Holly Jolly Christmas," and "The Christmas Shoes." Mostly, I want to hear them do Elton John's "Step Into Christmas."

5) William Shatner

If ever a holiday needed to be stripped to its raw nerve it's Christmas. Only...Shatner's delivery...can invoke in us...the true meaning...of Christmas.

6) Darth Vader

"Christmas With The Sith" is definitely a title that needs to be added to the canon of holiday albums. Imagine Vader in his holiday finest black cape sitting hear a spectacularly decorated wroshyr tree with the head of Count Dooku adorned on top. There are gifts under the tree, Darth Sidious in the background holding a tray with cups of eggnog and a nice Sic-Six-layer cake while little Luke and Leia open lightsabers and Sith holocrons from Santa the Hutt.

7) Lady Gaga

It's never too early to capitalize on unexplainable popularity by recording a holiday album.

8) Miley Cyrus & Hannah Montana

These two need to team up for a duets album filled with holiday cheer. Maybe Daddy Montana can get in on the action for an Achy-Breaky Christmas.

9) Beyonce

She could show T-Pain a thing or two about monotone singing without the use of autotune. Yes, Destiny's Child already did a holiday album, but there were two other tones on that one and it just isn't as dull and boring as Beyonce on her own.